Don't Worry, Joe Co.

Joe Eawest was alone, tied to a chair in his parents' living room.  Don't Worry Kyoko was just getting going.  

Fuck it, thought Joe Eawest.

"DOOOOOOON'T WOOOORRRRRRRRYY!!"

I'm already totally busted.  I might as well have fun with this.  Besides, Raymond doesn't know what I do about this album.  

Joe looked around.  His mouth full of joints was smoldering.  Thanks to the moist dankness of this Maui Wowee, three joints had already gone all the way out, and two others looked on their way out.  He shifted his inhaling to the side of his mouth with the lit ones, hoping the other would peter out.  After a moment, they did.  He let the dead joints fall to his lap, where his waiting hands began to deconstruct them and stuff the joint weed into his mouth and the torn rolling papers into his pocket.

"DON'T WORRY! DON'T WORRY! DON'T WOOOORRRRRRY!"

That leaves two parially smoked joints left to go.  No problemo.  He puffed them both heartily, coughing and chuckling.

The chair he was tied to was not screwed or secured to the floor at all, so it was quite easy to lift off the floor.  He scooted the chair all the way over to the five foot long wooden paneled General Electric FM/AM 3 speed turntable stereo home entertainment system.  It was one of those old jobbies, it stood almost two feet off the floor and looked like a long coffeetable with gold speakers.  When he was parallel to the left speaker he lifted his leg and flung it into the turntable.  He managed to both turn the volume down a bit, then cause the needle to slide the rest of the way to the end of the side with a horrible "SCCCCRRRRRRREEEEEEEEEEAAAAATCH!!!!"

Satisfied, he removed his foot and waited.  Then he smiled.  The record had started over.  The first song on that side was of course, Lennon's song Cold Turkey, which Joe loved.  It was almost his favorite song on the whole double album.  When the song finished, Don't Worry Kyoko began once again.  Joe bounced the chair a few times  The record skipped a couple times and found his new gouge and then bounced along it and screeched to the end of the side again.

In this way, Joe Eawest finished his two joints happily.  He ended up listening to Cold Turkey about five times, and to his new masterpiece, the 'remix' of Don't Worry Kyoko.
After he finished the jays, Joe figured out with stony clarity that he could yank the cord out of the wall with his foot.  He did, then managed to untie his right hand.  Raymond had been far too enraged to make a decent goddamn knot.  Fucking hothead.  He'd untied himself from the chair and stood.

And I'm outta here.  I gotta talk to Bart.

He decided that he'd ride his Schwinn Fleet.  He headed out to the garage.